mimicked in salt

my body feels so heavy

my arms, limbs, eyelids

my mouth turned down at the corners

my heart in my stomach

and my head clouded so thick.

i imagined the door closing,

light disappearing.

blackness.

and that wall being rebuilt,

brick by brick –

yet

the chasm was wider,

deeper and darker.

the cries of anguish

of resentment

of screaming, “why?”

repeatedly –

were my own.

those unbidden,

silent,

tears –

teasing me,

my raw emotion

mimicked in salt.

panic sets in.

palpitations,

quickness of breath,

shaking hands,

shivers intense.

the foetal position,

in my sacred space.

the sun didn’t cheer me

though

it shone direct

on my face.

self pity wound itself,

serpentine,

around my heart.

snaked my thoughts

my words –

such sharp darts.

the ache of my soul

felt deep within my bones.

simply nowhere to turn.

 

Maaaan, that is so utterly lethargic… painful, but still a useful tool – I’m talking about writing, about writing about your pain, your fears, your love, your emotions in general… and for every poet, it’s the same – we are only trying to describe the indescribable!

Needless to say, I’m in a better place now – these raw emotions were felt not so long ago, at the start of this year. However, that really was one roller coast of a ride, right down that canyon and straight into the watery depths at the bottom of a steep roaring waterfall. It took me a while to get my head up, out of that water, and begin the swim back to shore.

I couldn’t have done it without my family and friends. I am blessed. Thank you 🙂

 

 

Written and photographic content is © All rights are reserved.

2 Comments Add yours

    1. JojoBean says:

      Thank you… I didn’t really know how to end it, but I think it worked out ok. Coz that is pretty much how I felt – quite trapped. Anyways, thank you 🙏🏼

      Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.